I’m not a huge lotto gambler, primarily because in the States, you give up about 50% of your winnings to Uncle Sam should you beat the odds^ and win. I mean, we’ve gotta pay for healthcare somehow^^. Also, because I don’t like taking my hard earned dollars and literally tearing them up into pieces for no reason. If you really must know, I prefer — and am much better at winning at — cards (me love you long time, blackjack!).
In Canada (or maybe just Ontario?), you get to keep 100% of your winnings, the very opposite of what you’d expect from this exorbitantly taxed, but especially awesome, nation. So when I was ambling along on a recent weekend excursion and found not one, but two loonies* on two separate occasions, I figured it was my lucky day. I marched straight into PetroCanada and bought $5** on LottoMax, a ticket that would have netted me a cool $42 million. Let me just pause here to say that I can think of about forty-two million things I could do with $42 million and none of them include the words a) work or b) 9-5. But I digress.
As it turns out, it was my lucky day but only $5 lucky, because I only won a free play. Still, free is free, so I have my fingers, toes, arms, legs, and eyes crossed that tomorrow night will be my big night! And if it is, I’ll take each and every one of you — my tens of readers — out for a lovely, lovely time. You can bet on it.
[Ed.Note: the $5 quick pick I won yielded four of the seven LottoMax numbers, so I won $20! I was so close to hitting five numbers, I could taste it — the fifth number I needed was 32 on my ticket and 33 on the draw. So. Close.]
^ Odds that favour you getting struck by lightning over winning the lottery. Still, I remain undeterred!
^^ Wait a minute……. 😉
* That’s a $1 coin for the Americans.
** Each ticket is $5 here, though, so I only got one row of numbers. Bogus.